Trash: PFMH3 152 Turkey Trail
The plan was simple, meet CYHMN around 6pm at Woolly Mammoth’s to lay the first official running trail of the Year of Tits & Beaver/Beaver & Tits… September’s hash was a pub crawl, and the October was the 1st anal PFMH3/Bryn Mawr Running Club Beer Mile. TOS only had to travel about 10 miles by car and 1 mile by foot to park at the beer check, but traffic on Friday 11/18 was like people waiting outside a store for Black Friday sales at 4am -packed and vicious. Finally after a delightful 90 minute 10 mile commute (I could have almost run it!) TOS arrived at the beer check and proceeded to lay trail from there to Woolly’s, to save time.
After meeting CYHMN at the bar, we set off to lay trail – a shot check at Cianfrani Park, a beer check at Jefferson Square and lots of checks in case Cause showed up. When we got back, we had several anxious hashers waiting upstairs: Cause for Blindness, Flounder, Shaves My Pussy (SMP), Mary Fucking Poppins (MFP)… we headed out for Chalk Talk around 7:50 … and then as we pointed the pack in the direction of the r*n, 2 Clump Chump came running up so we pointed him to the pack which was just a half a block ahead – he quickly passed them as FRB.
CYHMN and TOS then shortcutted over to the park to wait for the pack with a shot check – spiked cider with Pumpkin Whipahol topping. Just a few short minutes after we arrived, 2 Clump and MFP came bouncing through the park and we poured them some shots. As the rest of the pack caught up, CYHMN took off to go to the beer check and TOS stayed behind as a "sweeper" to follow the pack and make sure no one got too lost in the angled streets and alleys of South Philly.
We ran down 8th to Catherine, and east on Catherine to 7th… Down 7th to a check at a 6-point star at Passyunk… the pack was fooled a few times with Falses and Back Checks, but luckily a true trail arrow up Carpenter led the way to 6th, and then south on 6th, through a supermarket parking lot to the brown-bag beer check at Jefferson Square. At the beer check, we said hello to the neighborhood watch, talked about SMP’s abandonment issues and how happy he was to see us there at the shot check with alcohol, and saw we missed S&M Man by a few minutes at Woolly’s. The trail continued back to Woolly’s east on Washington to Moyamensing, and stair-stepped north and west a block or two until it led to an ON-IN mark past the Zagar murals on Leigthgow St.
Circle added a few hashers who missed the trail, many of whom drank from the sacred vessels: Urine Luck, S&M Man, Tube Cock, Bonsai Bush, He’s a Lesbian, and Just Brad who showed up very late with a popped collar after a Yacht Club dinner.
Make sure you don’t miss next month’s exciting trail, the Jingle Our Balls Hash/Philly AGM Pre-lube at the Green Room, 12/2. Details right here!